Aching

hey guys I wish people here had some feelings for people who werent themself.. I wish they didnt think there was an alternative reason for you to tell them something...

I have been aching all over lately from this bed. I HATE it so much i want burn it and throw it out. I havent been feeling good these last couple days physically and i have been feeling like I want to throw up and collapse, but I also feel so weak Im having a challenging time even typing on the keyboard which is not the usual me T_T...

Alot of people think im faking that im feeling weak, ill, and in major pain, but i really am : /...

Conflict a Necessity?

personally i dont like conflict, I believe its really stupid most of the time... It only makes a difference depending on the situation.

like when couples fight you know what each other truly feel.

when close friends fight you are saving your love for each other...

when people you dont know fight... nothing matters because there is nothing to save... nothing of worth... nothing worth fighting for... pride? respect? by little tests of trying to get to someone? by doing foolish things of blaming where one has not done wrong or when someone flips your things over to make your life harder?

I have no time to give to such strangers i dont know... im not really curious about such people either... there decision to do such antics would only slow me down. Theres enough real problems in the world anyways, and enough things to do to not get bored... things like this... is just useless to give the time too...

these people... these strangers... there acts of conflict are given as a share of their values... some people feel and value that conflict is ones strength because when someone is confronted they give off a feeling of a rush with the adrenaline, unless there is nothing that hadnt already been expected of such people. Which in turn would cause those people to evaluate how the person reacted to the situation.

With impressionless look and an ask to repair thier own damage only a feeling of emptiness can be given to those who had caused misfortune to the person. No satisfaction or feeling, just a lingering of death because of the emotionless question of putting things back as once they were...

making the individual either confused or believe a totally negative belief that they think you follow... they may either be freaked out and not do it again... they might hate because they know they had done something wrong, or they maybe so confused that they need to see the answer... the face... the body language a second time to really feel secure of what they saw with thier eyes was truly before them...

Is being Otaku bad?

[B]Otaku Stereotype[/B]
The stereotype of an Otaku is a fat man with wide glasses who stays inside their room taping shows, commercials, and has a great interest in hentai. Usually male and has capsule kits and manga filled to the ceiling. They are also known to use both the TV and the Computer at the same time while trying to put together small model kits they bought of a zoid, gundam, or car.

However this is only a small group of people in the Otaku subculture who let them selves be lost in the media without recognizing any other parts of life.

[B]Personal Definition[/B]
I think that the second you gone and seen something other then Naruto or Bleach you have become a Otaku... Otaku are not the same as extremists because over the time the original stereotype is becoming way to targeted towards those who are interested in hentai. Whats the different stages of obsession? lets think about it

[B] 1. If you have seen more then just Naruto or Bleach you are an Otaku.[/B]

[B]2. If you Cosplay...[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point

[B]3. If you own Model Kits, Capsule Toys, or Keychains...[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point for each one of the 3

[B]4. If you own CCGs, Postcards, or Pencil Boards[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point for each one of the 3

[B]5. If you own wallscrolls, posters, or anime wallpaper[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point for each one of the 3

[B]6. If you listen to anime music and nothing else[/B]
your just narrow minded... and lost in your anime

[B]7. If you use anime terms in every day conversation and start acting like them[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point

[B]8. If you can do the Lucky Star or Haruhi Dance...[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point

[B]9. If you seen even really bad anime even being forewarned...[/B]
you gain 3 OCD points

[B]10. If you goto work or school dressed up as a anime character...[/B]
you gain 3 OCD points

[B]11. If you know more then 12 anime quotes[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point

[B]12. if you are apart of an Anime or Manga forum[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point

[B]13. if you attend your local Anime Convention, School club, or Weekend Anime Meetings[/B]
you gain 1 OCD point for each of the 3

14. If you write fanfics, draw fanart, or make remixes of anime songs...
you gain 1 OCD point for each of the 3
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honestly i see nothing wrong with being an otaku, I think that how Obsessive Compulsive you are about your hobby is more of the thing to fear really. Even if you are all these things no one should JUDGE you... its just if only these things run your life people are going to think... because it would be sad if all this is in your hobby but you are jobless and not attending school... but some people manage : / i know a few people who follow nearly all these and still have a life. It just gets harder to manage the farth you are in ANY hobby really ^_^U...

my personal score was 11 out of 26 OCD points :O

So Much Nothing

Alot of people always tell me there is so much more on the mainland except those who have actually lived in the mainland... I have become so bored of how little things there is to do here, it makes me wonder how people cant eventually think of making entertainment better.

Wheres the scanner? thats what has been in my mind for the past day! I need a scanner T_T, but even if i had one here in California I wouldnt beable to make much use of it because of my labtop here sucks alot. I need to eventually start coloring things at my home desktop T_T... i miss my 20 inch widescreen!

trapped where no one likes what i like T_T... everyone thinks all my ochestrated tunes are weird as well as my normal songs :( they all gotta respect peoples differences in musical tastes. This blog is pretty much rambling... i just want to come home T_T

Talking Shit is Stupid

One of my biggest pet peeves is grown men and women... more men... that go and fuckin have nothing better to do then bitch and complain about how everyone else decides to do their lives. I say only complain if your going to do something about it, otherwise you should just shut the fuck up.

Nothing to do with your time?
alot of people end up going into a routine and then bitch and complain about where their at, but their reason for being bored out of their fuckin mind is because they arent doing shit with their lives... I think this is the first reason why people go to the topic of talking shit...

Values by Different Location?
Alot of people have no idea that each person has different beliefs based on if their from different sections of the US... It just so happens alot of my values are asian cause I live hawaii, but people should fucken respect others differences, otherwise they should best just not say anything.

My Simple Little Life

Ranting:

1.Were All Here on this money driven planet...
what people do to get this money is with serving as many people as possible and turning a profit. The things that make the most money are things that are needs and the things which are wants aren't bought as often. Logical right? but most of the time serving a service or product for the purpose of just that isnt what feuled them. It is the money... which we all need to survive.

2.We need Leaders to tell us what were SUPPOSE to do... pshhtt
I think its annoying how people each have their beliefs decided for them by someone else or from a media device and not to sit down and just think about the 5 w's who what where why and when...

3.When people try to help others they are often seen as jerks because people dont have a good enough identification of personalities to understand the person means well : /...

Questions:

1. with hawaii being an island of paradise... do you really think cars should be more important over a transit system? i mean the metro is in the making... but it will take like 30 years? why is it not a priority? i have been reading about all the other things about hawaii, but I see traffic and gas to be one of our biggest problems.

What am I going to bother doing about this? well lets see I dont really have any political voice, but I just wish more people would take into considering that the metro should be a biggere priority than it has been....

2. The School Systems
i am seriously pissed off that we have to spend loads of cash to get regular education in our state : / I personally think the state should try and make one hawaii school website which has concentrated efforts for a hitech learning environment online. Then they can try to upgrade the old buildings to look artsy and make use of our hawaii-ish architecture design.

3.Where Hawaii should go?
simply were on an island. I think that the island should be the most hi-tech place in the world because we do not have any possible way to get our money except from bigger places like other countries and the mainland as a whole. Hawaii's Tourism industry is one of the only things that really bring money to our islands... I think if we spent more time concentrating on the Arts, Computer Science, and Online business that we would have alot more oppurtunity to make our state have some money...

A Impossible Plan?
right now things havent been so well in california, but i plan to try and be back home as soon as I can. I think the target date is in 3-4 weeks if i can.

The impossible plan comes when I go home...
There are things I want to do for the state, things I want to do for my hobbies, and things I want to do for my niche communities... its so large to think of the things I am trying to tackle, so I have to slowly list our a plan. Those who do not plan... plan to fail...

Sensei Penguin:
I need to first spend the time to try and talk to teachers about the k-8 lessons which they have and try to figure out a website which can help Hawaiis Education community which is all public and private schools and try to make it that theres a way people can accesss information to become better faculty and administration... I think alot of people in the Hawaii Education community start to lose focus on why they even went there or if they even like it?

Someone once told me that people go to be teachers because they cant be anything else... its kind of sad, but true... how can someone make education not torcherous? somehow discovery channel does so i am sure there is a way. They just need to use technology and art to the curriculum... i would much rather have a problem of people wanting to stay in school then many who do not value it...

But back to the main topic which is the Website Sensei Penguin... the website should contain different beliefs and point of views of different teachers around our state. It should show any awards that they have achieved and have a rating system for people who take the time to see if their teaching methods work and if logically it makes sense...

I think Sensei Penguin should also say the importance of each part in the large scale of how things run and how it is full of opportunity and fun.. I think alot of people lose the fun aspect especially in their jobs because they arent doing what they wanted to... a bigger thing is that I think they stop thinking of ways to make their job different or better. When people are stuck in routine it is easy but very boring... if people want to work less harder they should have some way to allow themselves to, like if they work for so many hours and feel like not there should be a system for it, which i almost guarentee there is no such system... The importance of a position I feel keeps the person having pride in their job...

Helping Transportation:
I think one of the things I will do in my free time is try to get information about helping the transportation systems of hawaii in the design area. Hopefully they already have a clear idea of how to make it work visually and I wont have to do anything and just nod to myself and agree that they are making it visually fun and easy to use but somehow I feel that is NOT going to happen.

Im probably going to try and ask some people online who know interior design or find local people who are fellow artists to help design the inside of a fake train... then im going to try and make a 3d model of a train and insides of the train and do my best to make a 3d hawaii... it would be of course totally fake, but I think it is a step in the right direction for hawaiis growth.

What do I expect from this? hopefully to raise awareness of the importance of the rail system and show there is a way that it can happen sooner. Is it really possible for it to happen sooner? im not sure but i doubt anyone cared enough to take a look and see what possibility there is!

Social Community of the Dorks
this part of the plan seems to be just as challenging as the others because I have to figure out how to make dorkism socially acceptable and show the differance between being a hobbyist someone who just doesnt mind participating and someone who is a Extremist in what they do with their dork hobbys...

there are many kinds of dorks... anime dorks, board game dorks, book dorks, comic dorks, RPG dorks, video game dorks, MMORPG dorks, and creative dorks...

I feel that alot of dorks end up becomming extremists in their hobby because of the games design. There are hundreds of rules and things to read in the text books. Making the learning curve nearly impossible. Those who stick around are nuts about the story which gives them a sesnes of escapism.

Awareness of a Game is only a Game, Awareness that Games are Social activities and not EGO stretchers... Game designs must have the simple 3 ingredients of luck, customization, and control aka game skill. Clothes lines must be made for dorks as well as supplies which allow the people to have a sense of individualism... This will add all kinds of new possibilities to the types of people who are attracted to games... if there are all these different parts to making this subculture I believe it will end up being more socially acceptable... even if I only raise awareness about Games being social activities...

To do this I will need to maybe take a trip to maui to my aunties house with at least 1000$ in my account to buy things to learn sewing... that way I can make quality products for Dice Bags, Counter Bags, and Messenger bags as well as tops and bottoms. Then I can see if people would pay for custom versions of these and then make them on the side while I work at home. If it gets big enough I would need to figure out a way which these items could be mass produced.

I would then need to design at least 12 games which are very fun and easy to get into... with my winning 3 ingredients.

I would also need to take time to figure out about Event making and create a event which will be interesting to both the general community as well as the hobbyists which will be called AiAnchor Animation Festival, which is known as A3F. It should be small at first so there isnt much money lost... It will primarily help the Japanese Media awareness and probably help several subcommunities.

The Martial Arts sub community, The Local Japanese Sub community and Japanese cultural Center supporters, The Otaku subculture community, the Board and Card game communities, and the Import book stores who have products of japan. I think I might somehow try to figure out a way to get the blood drive over on one of the days to get more public awarenesss since alot of small cons seem to do that.

this all sound impossible, but I will do everything I can possible to achieving these Dreams... they are my life...

Dice Bags for the Dorks

Recently i have been designing bags as I said in my previous blog... the materials are still undecided but the colors and the design on the bag itself has been decided... I made 3 pretend companies of Geekdom which we can refer to for fasion. The bags have a utilitarian use by transporting supplies and look very nice :D.

Fashion is the first step for social acceptance (no one will take a dork seriously if they are ill dressed)

Redesigning games to have 1-8 players and become easy to start playing and forever to master with the ingredients of luck, customization, and control... each one sharing a 33.3% of the game design... this makes it so anyone can join, everyone has a chance, and anyone can win :P.

Culture Creation

recently I have been looking at a few historical articles... audios... and pictures... it made me wonder on where the beginnings of many subcultures have come from? especially at its base... I have been heavily been into the music scene and have seen how subculture can influence the music. Sometimes depending on the sound of a type of music can cause a creation of a whole new subculture to come with it. I dont know all subcultures but I have been exposed to a decent amount.

Music has been getting labeled so many things lately. Just to use as an example... I will use the Core genre of rock since most people know about it... it has been sublabeled into such things as

Rock:
Oldies Rock- The Who (symbol of 40's-60's rock)
Hard Rock- Metallica (symbol for Rocker subculture and Manliness)
Symphonic Rock- Queen (symbol of Symphony+Rock merge)
Emo Rock- The Used (symbol for emo subculture)
Nerd Rock- Weezer (symbol for dorks and geeks subculture)
Visual Kei- Malice Mizer (symbol for otaku subculture
Alternative Rock- Incubus (symbol for 90's rock)

its funny how alot of subcultures argue with each other of whats coolest because they all have some sort of similarity in it... even just by being labeled subculture they have something in common.

I figured that the music scene will eventually be labeled too many things to come up with unless listed online and specified by search... What sort of irritates me is that there are alot of people who enjoy these subcultures... but i can say for every 5000 or so theres only 1 person who wants to expand or create more things for their subculture community. The sad thing really is that for the few that want to they stick in only that subculture community so they are even less exposed to other things.

Since im what i call a Subculture Hybrid... ill use myself as an example for this definition...
Subculture Hybrids is a name I made up for people who are multi-niched and multi-subculture... I feel people who want to live to their fullest should NOT be in only a single niche or subculture. Life gets real old real FAST if you do...

My Niches and Subculture Dissection-

Otaku> Cosplay> Manga> Anime> Model Building
Japanese Culture> Music
Dork>Dance Dance Revolution>RPGs >Computer News
Geek> Board Game> Collectable Card Games> Miniatures
Artist> Drawing> Composing> Film> Writing> Indie Music
Goth> Industrial Music
Punk> Clothes Style> Alternative Music


I would say Im more versatile then your average person because most people dont like dipping into anything from what I call their home subculture... Personally my home subculture was Artist. Some niches and subcultures are easier to join then others based on your interests of course.. Like Artists are almost destined to be future Otaku or have an interest in Dorky activities because it shares similar chemical stimulation of escapism the feeling of being out of reality and into a virtual world or setting which is unreal.

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What have I been up to?
recently I have been trying to make around 8 designs for boxes I plan to make prototypes of in the future... I also designed 12 dice pouches and have been looking on the internet for a variety of different products I think need enhancement to further the Dork/Geek/Otaku subcultures.

A Friend Named Anthony Molina
Yesterday I met for the third time with a friend I made in california named Anthony. He and his girlfriend Denise who is really hot invited me to lunch. Anthony is a great guy and his GF is hot! so how could i say no right? lol... He treated me to a burrito place I had never gone to, it was really good and especially good cause I didnt have to pay. We chatted a bit about how things were and then my art... and I told him about the one time I went with my friend Brian to Paradena which is about a 20 mile walk. I totally got destroyed that day my legs felt like total shit. I plan to see him again this week... I found out he loves all the same things I do and that he has a good heart... thats always something important to me. At home I havent been able to meet many people with a good heart... i label those people... people who have Pure Hearts. Those who care about others as much as themselves... people who are balanced in their decisions and have common courtesy. Its people like him which is going to make comming home hard, but im feeling so depressed in the house here it might just be for the best, but he is just so kind and fun... it makes me think twice about if anyone at home really would care if I did come back? well as far as friends go : /. I know I shouldnt care so much about other people but its apart of my personallity that I like the company of people...

Saiyonara Akira
Another one of my friends has gone T_T... my good friend Akira who is a fellow Otaku has gone back to Japan. He called me right before he left Oahu on his flight back to Fukuoka... The internet is a great thing in how it makes it so we can keep in contact. I always will remember those nights where we would compose Megaman music. Only he and one other friend have I been able to talk to Megaman about :/ and that other person is in WA so I guess im destined to keep my love for Megaman to myself T_T.

New Music!
even if im trapped in this hellhole I still was able to get Utada Hikarus new album! as well as a new 08 release for Flow, Asian Kung Fu Generation,Back On, and Ayumi Hamasaki!

Niches Rule our Lives

The longer I stay here in California it gives me a clearer and clearer view of hawaii, and alot of an idea of whats going on at home in the outlying islands. The way people act are like a weird combination of "American, Asian, and Polynesian" in the way our social environment works. Whats social environment? I believe it is the area you grow up in and the common policies of that place.

I believe each state seems to have its own policies of how respect works, as well as everything else. When you go to different countries nearly everything is nothing that you had learned and is nearly completely different. At least when comparing Asia and America...

When you ask people what their interests are they will tell you different activities.

Indoor- most of these are to entertain your brain with information and to mentally stimulate your brain

Outdoor- most outdoor activities allow you to Explore and Make yourself feel better

What we do tends to be based on what were willing to change and then we always first ask ourselves if it socially acceptable. If people are worried about reputation they tend to automatically not do what is not socially acceptable. Games are one of the things that are socially unacceptable... because a large amount of people believe that they do nothing for your life.
The work as entertainment and a social Ice Breaker... those are all what games do.

But there are different reasons for playing a game...
some people play it to have
"Competition"
"Cooperation"
"Challenge Them self"
"Social acceptance"
"Entertainment"
"To be apart of something"

whats difficult in any social situation is that you have to figure out which one of these the other person believes in and try to stick within those boundaries. Well, no one has to do anything but sometimes it causes discomfort if you are trying to get to know someone by talking about how great it is that the players are together playing one game when you are talking to someone who told you they care about the competition aspect... which would make them only care about winning and less about what social connections they are making.

The world is made up of Niches, it is really weird but unless its called a Niche the description doesnt really hit you. When someone says hobby or activity they like to do... all you would really think is oh its something you like to do, but if they said thats my niche... you really understand what they mean is... thats the boundaries I have set for things I like to do... which builds a small amount of things you can do together... the sad part is that if you try to introduce them into something you like... unless you are really best buddies they will not even dare look in that direction... and then you even have to take time to think if its something they might even have the slightest interest in doing? for example if someone loves all outdoor things if you are suggesting a indoor activity it might not go so well.

With the niches everyone chooses their world becomes smaller and smaller and even when we get better at those niches and stay in them longer the world gets even more smaller... we have only so much time on earth and the amount of niches is huge... we have to pick and choose what we place our time into and try to think of the best way to do it or else we will stay in the same place...

socially a niche will break the ice but you will never REALLY get to know the person unless you meet outside of the niche. Just like every other activity you do with people...

sometimes though i feel a bit sad that Niches will limit your social activitiy, and if you wish to meet more people you must expand your niches... and if that doesnt happen your personality better be top notch for them to not get bored with it... and thats a whole nother world of problems having a good personality...

Good Personality+Niche+Survival+loyalty= best friend?

maybe... sometimes even I wonder if there are things that should be called best friend? maybe most compatible friend might be most accurate : / ill write a bit more on that next time. Thanks for readin.

Dissection of Subculture

Each person is Different... They are likely to like what is familiar to their origin, national, or local infuences as well as their Subculture Influences... of course the most comfortable things would be what was introduced in their upbringing and social activities.now that we have that settled lets discuss what kind of addiction playing Board Games, Video Games, Card Games, and just games in general are... it mostly feeds Escapism which allows the person to immerse them self in a nonexistent world. This is usually in the form of Movies, Books, and Games. The next chemical it feeds is Ego...

Games I feel were brought into the world hundreds of years ago for the reason of furthering social interaction among humans. It would fall under the category of Entertainment.

To feed the Escapism a Designer would have to make an elaborate world that has plenty of detail for the person to indulge in.

Ego is close to personalizing... The feeling of making something is yours and unique to you... I feel gaming has a lack of this involved because alot of product makers do not understand that this is an important part to the escapism.

When someone Originally joins a game they like to feel apart of a group even if its a made up one

The best game of the Year 01 which sold 9.5 million copies starcraft used this to their avantage.
A way people can feel ownership over something is the Color Scheme, A Choice of a Faction, Customization, and how unique their appearance is.

This means it is effected by Fashion and Options. Being able to reminding them they are apart of these things in the real world is just as important as they are in the game world.

For example if they see a Keychain, bag, pencil, anything they use on a daily basis they will be reminded that they are apart of those things in the game world and it will bring further satisfaction of being a fan of that game. However it seems that most companies neglect this and make the game itself better but lack in other products...

Most subcultures have enough product to fill a store like the Emo/Gothic community has Hot Topic to feul their fandom of subculture but the Game community has not nearly as much if any at all and the Otaku community only is getting into Keychains and Stuffed animals... but still not big on the personalize products it seems...

The most neglected things I feel are Deck Cases and Messenger Bags... these are both seen all the time to transport all sorts of games and devices which are symbols of an Otaku or Gamer.

Board Games... Negative Meaning

It seems the more I try to figure out my own subculture community it seems that those in the subculture community see me the observer as some sort of alien threat. When I walk into the game stores I slowly notice that there are people who are so speciallized in their hobbys that they forget about those outside of it. It seems so strange at first because I was always apart of the hobby scene back in hawaii, however trying to join new people in their activities almost seems scary because its like a small cult in a way.

People in the community love some of the ideas if they are open to positive change, but some people resented it with hate unless it purely served a utilitarian role. Utilitarian meaning a direct Use.

A few ideas i have been trying to figure out is a way to transport Cards, Miniatures, Counters, and Dice in a more fashionable sense... also make catagories for different kinds of comics. The sizes of American comics seem to be too large for the average person to store... even japanese manga takes up loads of space... I learned that people think of comics as just super hero things and that really the definition for comic is what the book world calls a Visual Book or an Illustration which leads the person seeing it to think it is a more professional thing than a comic... but a comic is the same thing except called something else...

The social aspect is directly connected to the design of the game... and after discovering this... i learned that only very few games are social... Magic The Gathering, Clix, and Warmachine franchises are barely social... however the approach of Privateet Press makers of Warmachine keeps prices high while making the game easy to expand and easy to learn. The games Privateeer Press makes are easy to dive in and dive out from 30 minutes-1 hour long games. About the time in a movie which is also a form of Escapism... all media is Escapism, but the amount in hobby games has been overbearing in the past 20 years. I hope that more companies like Privateer Press invade the hobby industry....

The main way to keep things good with a game socially is to make it so you still have a life outside of it. Reason why most videogames are ideal for this except for the existence of the MMORPG...

A long While

Its been awhile since I was last able to have a chance to post. My parents came over to California to see how I was doing, and found out that I was unahappy with how things were going. We talked about the situation and conflicting views between my brother and I on what we both wanted out of this experience...

It seemed my brothers point of view wanted to me to approach things of the fine artist... while my own goals were quite different. To draw better is a life long thing approaching thing such as thick and thin lines... shadow shapes... the body... coloring, and many other components to a good drawing. These are all very good to learn but I think the thing that keeps me from spending night and day on this is trying to accomplish my own selfish goal of a shop. So, I always worked on the projects my brother gave me, but I always had wondered in the back of my mind how I was going to be able to make my shop...

Retail has been something I was interested in from when I first saw shops around my local area... however I knew that something about the every day customers made shops some sort of hang out as well... it wasnt until starbucks came around that it was normal to loiter because of their business strategy... I have had many experiences which told me a great deal about retail and its both good and bad... I have come to learn everything has its own Yin and Yang effect no matter what...

The first time I worked retail at Hilo Hatties it showed me what real retail was with the stock room, registers, and treating customers as herds of cow that we had to get out as soon as possible, but with helping them...

I went into Toys and Joys thinking it was similar, but this was catering to a niche crowd of customers that had similar interests that I had. This gave me a great I opener into seeing how people are very different in their indepthness of their hobbies and how it varies and effects their lives. People who were obsessed with games ended at a path of only gaming, and those who were interested in anime continued to watch the films all the time when they got home without understanding anything of the social drawbacks... this made me feel very uneasy, because unlike my brother I am very social and wish to create a sense of community.

I saw this lacking in multiple areas of my interests and I was thinking that this is probably the key reason these interests are not found out by many people such as Card Games, Video Games, Board Games, Japanese Animation... alot of these communities have labels and names but alot of them get so sucked into the media that they forget whom they are and what the rest of the world is about... they dont even have much in depth things to show that they socially belong to their hobbies they are so loyal too. From a design standpoint that means the products that are made are only to continues the fad or local top ranking show or game.... I dont really see any types of hair styles, clothes, or accesseries which help any of the subculture like other subcultures do... I think this is the main reason Otaku and Board Game Geeks are not taken seriously even if they kind of have a subculture... if you can even call it that without the products to support it...

An example would be to Face Emo culture which is fairly new and Otaku culture which is old...
The emo culture has many accessories and clothes and bags that are from the Gothic culture which has alot of products to show they are into, yet if you ever were to see an Otaku you would only expect to see someone with no fashion sense and have nothing but a portable game system and no other real identifiers... in japan the main identifier would be the ring tones on the system or you would need to see an Otakus bedroom to really know they are what they say...

I always wanted to help my community in the Anime/Manga community as well as the Board Game Community... however I am noticing that there are parts that bond well and parts that dont bond well when trying to help two communities at the same time... the anime community only takes from the Board and Card Game communities titles such as Magic The Gathering, Warmachine, and maybe a stretch id say Warhammer 40k.

I have begun trying to see the patterns of both types of shops which specirfically cater to these two communities. The Anime Manga community seems to have so many titles that alot of crap is what stays around... and there isnt really a place to sociallize about the anime... let alone figure out other things outside of anime. What im trying to get at is that the downfall happens to be that all the media is on a TV and thats the same problem as only being a fan of a TV show... somehow there has to be products and stores which make fans of anime go and do other things but have products that still remind them of the shows they use for escapism that they so love.

The board game community has alot of smart people but thats the problem is the games are designed for smart people. Smart maybe the wrong thing to use... maybe people how enjoy thinking alot with certain activities and board games can get as complex or simple as anyone might wish it to be... i also noticed that these games are mostly used as advertising tools for a prexisting franchise to just make it more scene and interactive... and when the fad dies it dies. The only ones that stick around are the social games from hundreds of years ago or original card games which the card game it self is the franchise.... The summarrized version would be its the flaw in the design of the product which leads this hobby to have a dead end with sociallizing because very few people like to play things for the sake of only over thinking a scenario...

I am talking with m y brother to see if he can take me to Anime and Hobby stores around California so I can see how they work and I hope we can talk together about this because when I chat about the topic it seems the longer we think about it together it gets easier to invision all the good and bad and make up some suggestions to fix some of these problems... maybe when I finally am able to understand how these sub cultures and communities function... I will feel more comfortable with spending alot of my lifes cash which I saved on my anime/hobby shop.

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California Roughs

ART
Its been a bit rough lately with arguing over who is correct about the arts. My brother is angry that I am not fast at art and that i like everything to be perfect and scale. The practice which I think hes trying to teach me is to make a good picture that is somewhat to scale, but more to capture the moment. This could be the totally wrong thing hes teaching me...but thats what i got after speaking to his roommate Brian and his making it friend Joe. We spent time to sit down and look at the previous artworks which was Joes idea to ask me to make a pile of things I thought were good and a pile of things I thought were bad now that I learned some new techniques. I believe Joe had done this to see if my vision first of all was the same as I got here... and to see which pictures that may possibly had suppose to had been in the crap pile that I still thought were good... the reasons backing up those pictures would tell them the answer of where I was going wrong with the art. I personally thought this was an ingenious idea... instead of my brothers tactic of yelling louder and taking away my most valued music from me T_T...

SURVIVAL
As far as the survival goes I just got a package from my mama and it contained some Yakisoba Sauce and Yakisoba as well as Instant Yakisoba. Sometimes I wish I had taken some cooking classes when i was at home, because it seems i like cooking almost as much as art. Its now up there on my top lists of fun things to do... Composing, Drawing, and Cooking are now my new top 3. However I still havent had the chance to go and wash my clothes : / it seems that its so cold here i almost fear taking a bath rather then an option at home...

While being here for only a month I still have enough can goods to last me at least a little while... but I learned if I keep anything of my own in the fridge... it vanishes very quickly. So, i have been trying to figure out a way i can cook foods that will feed me for multiple of days.

The next problem is to experiment and figure out if the recipes are going to work, expecially with me cooking them : /. I have little time and no printer to figure out what i need to buy at the local super market, and little time to actually experiment... leading to many days of fast food...

<3>The sad part when i think about it is that friend wise I hardly if at any left anyone at home who actually cared about me... I can really maybe say less then three, and its hard because My fear of phones and all... But, I do miss having to do nothing because my mom and having my grandma who doesnt stop talking :/ I did think there was this one girl in california was pretty cute named Miya however that is out of the question for persuite because to my luck she was in an up and coming rock band named "paper thin walls". So, i just hashed the idea of going for some famous girl, but she was really sweet kind and polite, and nerdy to boot ^^U all the things i look for. Well, hopefully i can get out of this house and make some friends... its surely depressing to not see anyone during the weekend, or have anything in common with anyone. Its almost as if its just me having a relationship with the walls and windows of the house.

3 weeks

its been awhile here at camp snake bite... i learned that things get lonely here because theres no one to hang out with except Brian, and since Brian likes to do nothing unless its his way, just as my brother... both of them my bro and brian are pretty boring...

Meeting some of the people at the party was okay, but the next day its back to the computer and everyone elses lives move on with little to no communication. Couples in and out make it had to talk to the guys and well, anyone else around the house too.

My brother has been angry today cause he wanted pictures done, but i was taking out the garbage washing dishes, doing as he said at the time to watch a movie, or feed myself, or what other tasks he may have me doing. I wanna tell him fuck no, ill get it done when i get it the fuck done. I have been practicing drawing objects around the house, but since he says its crap, it doesnt matter. Personally i feel im not getting much better because im trying to learn how to survive alone, but at the same time i think that is much more important then drawing. Sure, drawing might be one way to make cash, but i dont see much of a future about learning this particular skill.

I am still trying my hardest to grow up faster, get a girlfriend, and learn how to draw better, but it just seems that its not working no matter how hard i try. I am trying to figure out how alot of basic things work out, and even if my bro doesnt like it, i cant help it that i dont know. He can go fuck himself if he wants me to do it any faster, because like it or not im only going to draw him one picture. Since i am still trying to learn better techniques to draw which he is not telling me.

Difference in Days

Oh my god im so sorry i neglected my blog so long. Things have been pretty much the same everyday where I wake up, draw, check my email, and then head to bed.

The only thing that was different was that Brian went with me to a couple of places to drink Coffee, as he showed me these places we met alot of pot heads.

Yesterday was a waste of time because Denise, John, and I went to Little Tokyo to see the Murakami exibit, however what we ended up doing is going to go get a whole bunch of soda and visiting tons of Bike shops.... My brother is so assuming and nitty gritty sometimes... its really annoying, he says im a lyer cause i tell him i dont like to eat things and he sees me eat them. Would he ever wonder if i had all the rice i needed and had an option to eat anything else? he probably has no clue that the reason i eat those things are cause if I dont eat the snacks my mom brought who the hell will? no one else seems to like eating Macadamia nuts.

I told him i
dont eat ice cream often, which is true. But i always like coffee ice cream, but most places dont have one i like, or it just isnt close by.

dont eat alot of bread... at home i prefer rice thank you, so im still trying to get used to the bread and potato thing down here.

dont eat snacks... Which is true, except two items... Maui Onion potato chips, and Chocolate pretzels. Which i do my best not to buy.

dont eat veggies and fruits, but im tryyyying to.

He thinks im a lyer cause, idk, hes a dick face.

Today just started, so I dont really know what the whole agenda is... my brother and I are suppose to head over to the Murakami Exibit. Who is Murakami? hes suppose to be a famous anime artist who hates Otaku, which is strange considering Otaku are Anime Fans... The statement hes trying to make is that if u indulge yourself too much in any one thing you never see the rest of the world.

Melow Sunday

The dictator finally ran outa things for me to do on his to do list. I first woke up at around the afternoon 12 ish. One of my brothers friend's friend woke up at 7 o clock and woke up the other boys. There was several people sleeping in the Living room. Aaron, Chris, Chris 2, and myself.
Chris 2 left in the morning.

Around 9 o clock everyone started to wake up and they talked about cars. I was so bored and finally asked. "whats so great about these big toys anyways." the room went silent.

I then went into my brothers room, where he and Denise were watching a weird anime about music. It seemed strange to me because it was ochestral, and i didnt really like ochestral, but my brother thought it was interesting. He continued to work on his bike which he had taken apart the night before.

Denise was going out to buy some food for john and herself, so i decided to tag along to buy some groceries and familiarize myself with Ralphs and Trader Joes. I asked Denise what the difference between onions were... there are three i think... and then there were products all around the store that had organiz labels. I was so confused, i felt like i had walked into a jungle of mysterious objects I could not understand. She slowly told me about the different types of onions and labels. I ended up leaving the store with some chicken, haole sushi, and eggs.

When i got back, i wanted to play Tekken with Chris, but Tony had a major problem with games. Aaron and Tony said games are only for pussy boys, so Chris and I never got a chance to play.

Later on Brian started to critique my drawings along with John and started to see how i was progressing. Tony later asked me if this is what i really wanted to do for the rest of my life, and i thought to myself.... maybe, maybe not. No percise answer, but there was one thing i knew i wanted... and it was to make my own games and Internet Cafe back in hawaii, or even an Event.

Brian later on invited me to dinner after asking John the great dictator for permission. We headed down to Pasidena to a mexican fast food place called "Chipotles" the bill was about 7$ each and Brian told me he would cover it. Brian was telling me about his life situation and that h feels he ran out of creative juice, life options, and a guide to where he might go next.

Hopefully this upcomming week things will be as today was, because i really enjoyed this sunday. Until next time ^^

Cold Day

I woke up late as usual... the day looked pretty blue, until my brother sent me outside to go draw. It seemed okay, but the first couple of drawings i drew, my brother just hated them... he said No! and then NO no no! and then NO! all wrong

So, i started to feel like wtf dude!? so after about half the day went by he FINALLY showed me what kind of drawings he wanted. Took him long enough... around the end of the day room mate brian came back to smoke some goods while i was drawing. I started to feel like i was a frozen Popsicle at that point. My brother told me to stop faking it... but it was SOOO cold!!! my drink started to get that cold on the outside look...

I was really irritated by the black widows... at that point i wish i just went back inside to draw something that wouldnt risk getting bitten... After awhile i think my bro got a important call, so he told me to go inside and draw. I drew two pictures of the rock, and he still isnt home. Two packages arrived for him, but i still dont know whats next since he is still not home. Until next episode of Camp Snake Bite.

Lift Off

hello everyone! this is octobomb, im finally back to personal blogging, after a long 3 years of absents.

The planeride was horrid, sleeping on the plain was near impossible, and I was all dehydrated by the time i got off. The seats must have been made out of rocks or something, because it was just was very uncomfortable. When we arrived I waited for my parents to get the rental car and played my new Nintendo DS that I got from a friend.

I recently moved to California to see what it would be like to take care of myself and to learn the teachings from Hitler himself... my brother. My parents were just here, and they bought me so much supplies. All of it was important though :P... I have been just trying to get myself used to this new life style.

No more mom making me breakfast or doing the laundry... no more friends, then again that wasnt much of a change considering theres only very few who actually care to keep in contact. I think the biggest change was just being independent and not knowing anything that was around the area at all.

I wish i had more time to look around the place, but my brothers scheduling is weird... I wake up aroun 11 o clock cause my brain is still not used to the time zone. So, i usually eat and stuff, and begin drawing around 1 or 2 in the afternoon... I have to draw and read, but then i only end up doing it for a few hours because by the time i know it is so cold and its time for dinner.

So, things feel a bit disorganized, but then again its to be expected. Its juts very hard to see what my brother is talking about, because he will not allow me to write anything down, or try to think back on it... I dont even have Microsoft word to type out any of my notes, so Hush hush! ^^ Im not even suppose to be on a blogger i bet, man that brother of mine and his 10 million rules :P.

Well, hopefully ill get adjusted... just in due time
See ya Blog Readers!